Thursday, November 29, 2012

In a call for true religious equality


Pennsylvania Pastafarians
are asking for an equal place in their local courthouse holiday display.
“Good morning commissioners, it is my honor to address you today,” Evangelical Pastafarian Tracy McPherson told the commissioners at a meeting. “Last December as I drove through West Chester, I was pleased to see holiday displays in front of the courthouse. Prominently displayed were the Jewish menorah and the Christian nativity display depicting the birth of Christ. These symbols represent the meaning of the holiday season for two religious communities in our area. I could not help but feel that the display was incomplete, as there was no acknowledgement of my religion present.”

The quasi-religion and its pasta-deity were spawned in 2005, when Bobby Henderson mocked the Kansas Board of Education in an open letter for allowing the teaching of Intelligent Design, a variation of creationism, in public schools. The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster has since grown into a full-blown movement, boasting millions of members.

“As a Pastafarian, I believe the Flying Spaghetti Monster created the world and all that is in it,” McPherson explained to the commissioners. “He holds us all to the ground with his noodly appendages and that explains why we do not float away.”

The Evangelical Pastafarians would like to see their pasta-decorated pine tree placed alongside the Jewish and Christian displays. Despite its satirical appearance, McPherson insisted her devotion to the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster was serious.
He boiled for your sins. May you be blessed by his noodly goodness.

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